Don't get too excited...it's not that good.

By a show of hands, who all thought I was dead? Anyway....here is the exceptionally long list of all the things you've missed in my absence.

1.) I got married! And I have a kid!

Okay I wasn't gone that long, but you gotta admit...it was a long time.

2.) I have not had Junior Mints in two weeks! Say whaaat?! I felt like I was consuming an unhealthy amount of them so I decided to back off.

3.) I bought the coolest shirt ever yesterday!

4.) I have gotten a tiny bit better at softball. I have not done anything stupid in the past 4 games which is a major improvement! I was beginning to think I was the sucky kid who no one wanted to play with but they gotta have 10 players so they let me play anyway. I actually still think that, BUT I'm not AS sucky as I was at the beginning. Baby steps!

5.) I saw the must disturbing, weird, gross-looking thing at the mall...

Ahh!! It's the Cookie Monster!!! Ha. Get it? Cause she is on a cookie....?

*cough*

Why would anyone do this to a cookie? Cookies are the embodiment of all things good and these people ruined it.

6.) Lebanon has a Dairy Queen now! Words cannot describe how happy I am about this. Apparently it has been here for a few weeks and I was completely unaware!! I'm considering an Oreo Blizzard after I get off work actually.

7.) Earlier today someone asked me if I was old enough to drive. Really? Seriously? I've been over the age of 16 for 7 years now!! And the first person to tell me in the comments "you'll appreciate that when you're 40" will be banned from my blog...forever.

8.) Doralynn I just read my Facebook....you are banned.


That was a lot of writing for my first day back! I think I'll stop while I'm ahead.